grey/gray? who knows...
I slip in and out
Over and back.
It’s so easy to slide,
So easy to jump between.
I move back and forth.
I climb over the wall,
Or simply walk right through.
No trouble at all.
But the strings won’t break.
I’m forever tied in between,
Tied to the wall:
To the vast, grey nowhere.
The strings won’t break,
And so I continue.
Never able to delve deeper,
Never able to explore.
Here I live
In the grey,
In between worlds,
In between lives.
Tied to the wall
Because I can not choose;
Because I can not see
Beyond the grey.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
Hmm this is very interesting, I like it. There's only one stanza with rhyme though so that sort of threw me off. And I believe grey can be spelled both ways, sort of like the weird word ax and axe
.
PM me if you have any questions.
My favorite line:
I move back and forth.
I climb over the wall,
Or simply walk right through.
No trouble at all.
*The rhyme really worked for me, though maybe the word "simply" should be taken out in the third line so that it flows better in length.
My least favorite line:
But the strings won’t break.
I’m forever tied in between,
Tied to the wall:
To the vast, grey nowhere.
*This stanza is okay but I don't fully understand its meaning. "To the vast, grey nowhere"? What is the grey nowhere? And I don't thing the comma should be there. Did you by chance mean "grey nothing"?
Altogether this was a nice poem.
Keep it up!
~Rieda